August 26, 2010

Who are Real Friends?

Today I learnt a crucial lesson? I guess I have been naive all these times. This post adds on to my previous posts on "Friendship Sucks at time". Well its that time of the year where friends graduate and you get to see friends who you may not have seen for some time. My dear friend Jean from Singapore came by. She finally have conquered the PhD degree @ The University of New South Wales. I share her joy of completion of her degree.  As I am in the same degree program as she is, I truly understand the mental and physical challenges that she had to endure during the past years to complete her research. Congratulations to her!

I felt special when she came by and met me personally a couple of days before her graduation ceremony. Knowing that she has her parents here for her Graduation Ceremony, I really didn´t want her to take time off and spend time with me. After all, family comes first and definitely, knowing Jeanie, she would love to bring them around to places that she adored while she stayed here for 6 years. But it was such a heart warming meeting. She came by and we had our little chats, just like old times. She is one of the nicest friends, who depite her busy schedules, will always find time to text message me or drop by my room to say a quick Hi. She is indeed a real gem of a friend.

On the other hand, I heard about another friend´s graduation. I have known him about the same years as Jean. I didn´t know he was graduating today until Jean told me that she had seen his name on the Grdauant´s List. Although I know that all are busy in their own ways, I wish he had taken that extra effort to mention about his graduation. He was a friend I had become close to. We had shared quite a lot, both on a social and personal level. It hurts to know that he did not even think of mentioning about his Graduation. I would have been really happy to know that he is graduating, he had put a lot of effort in his thesis. I just don´t understand why someone who had been such a good friend, not in a emotional way but in a supportive manner, would not want me to share the joy of his DAY? What saddens me more is that I had at times taken time to comfort, share and talk things out with him when he had problems and this is what I get in return, a snub off the shoulder...sigh!

I know different friends translate and define friendship differently. But there are some common platforms that are needed to be met in order for that friendship to develop and continue. Thus I guess, Jean has built upon a friendship measure of maintaining while my other so called friend had decided that it was more of a short term. Indeed I was naive, thinking that all friends will remember me and the friendships that we had.I was naive to think that the friendships that I create while I am in Sydney will last forever. I was indeed naive that some friends meant more to me and had spent too much time , ignoring a few good ones during. It has indeed opened my sights into what true friendships are. Jeanie will always be my friend, she has indeed have proven her friendship to me, not by buying presents but by simeple emails, updates, and visiting me or calling me up for short catch-ups when she is in town....so yes, in return I will always remember her sweet and true friendship and be as true to her too.

Well Congrats Jeanie! You are an awesome friend indeed and you always have been there for me, not 24/7 but at least there for me when you can. Thats what matters.... I also would like to apologise to friends who I may have ignored for friends who I thought were an important aspects of my life. I am still figuring out who are my REAL friends and who are fakes...at least after today´s lesson, I can cross out one name from the list of friendship....


Signing off....

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