I have a huge doubt on the saying above...I had been thinking of my friends the past few days. Ever since moving to Sydney, I had made quite a few friends who made me feel safe.But lately I have been asking heaps of questions about what is Friendship. Is it for one's gain? Is it to have someone when you only need them? Is it something that you develop on and be there for each other.... Although I wish it was the latter...its not been like that, sadly :-(
And this lead me to think:
Do I always have to initiate a get together?
Do I always have to be the 1st to say Hi on Facebook/email them and update them of what's been happening and ask them about their life?
Do I always have to be the 1st to go and visit them at their home or call them out for a casual coffee chats?
Its seems like I have been taking the initiatives, even when I am bogged by heaps of work and research. Why me? I am sick and tired of this. Seriously!!!! I know this is a small matter but to me, I feel that all have an equal contribution whether in a relationship or in friendship or in family.
As the saying goes "old are gold"...well I know who are "gold" and who needs to be tossed out as their gold lining has faded. I'm not musing that all the friends that I have near and far needs to always keep in constant contact. I mean, I know everyone are busy with their work/social/self commitments. But all I am asking is if I initiate a chat/email/Facebook message, please take time to reply and say Hi at least...makes me feel that I am indeed a "welcome" than a "unwanted" .
Than, there are those who only seek me when they have problems. I mean, I love to be of any form of help or just be a listening ear, but, please, when I call and email you just to chat for fun or catch up and you scuff me off and you want me to make time for you! Forget it! I have enough of this "taking me for granted" stuff. I am human too and I have feelings. So don't hurt my feelings and expect me to run over to you every time you have a problem. That is not friendship , its making use of someone who always been nice enough to say "NO"....
And to those out there who think that they have the best opinion about everything including the friends I have, well, you don't. You can never judge a person from their looks, you have to get to know them and believe me , you yourself is of no good in many ways too.....so try and be fair to all or just don't say anything!
But on a brighter note, I still treasure my friends back home, a few but truly gems of friendship...no matter what, regardless of the distance we always stayed together through all our problems and tough times including happy moments as well. They are my true friends. No matter how busy they are with work/social/family/kids & self...they always drop me an email, sometime with just a single sentence..."How are you?' and that alone fills my heart with joy even when I am at the lowest of point in the day/week/month or it just adds on to my happiness...so I am thankful to you girls...love you all heaps...
Signing off,
M
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